Followers

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Larry H.

so you were doing construction work and you accidentally nailed your hand to a 2x4. youre incompetent, angry, and seek revenge. you have the motor skills of patrick star... you need larry h parker.

for many years, larry h parker has been fighting for you. i once saw the guy step in the ring with a tiger. he sued the shit out of it! that tiger had so many legal fees to cover it was ridiculous.

one of my friends slipped while at work... i couldnt blame him. the kid he stepped on was totally in the way. they fired him! none of us could believe it. where was our justice? here he was.... practically on his death bed without any source of income other than the state welfare. we did what any other red blooded american would do, we sat on our asses and bitched. OMG did we bitch... we bitched at each other, we bitched at our neighbors... hell, even the mailman got bitched at. finally after watching maury, we saw an add for larry h parker. i almost hurt my hand dialing so fast. larry himself answered the phone and i told him about my friends accident and the near miss i just had with the number pad. he told me not to worry... shit, i wouldnt even have to pay until after he won the case! we sued the company for almost $50,000. thats like... a lot.

so the court date came and my friend and i put on our best suits. we went into the court room with larry. i was so nervous. larry seemed so confident. he kicked in the court room doors and busted his ass down the aisle. he threw his briefcase down and proceeded to TELL the judge how this shit is going to go down. everyone kept there whore mouths shut while he was talking.... it was amazing. the judge ruled in our favor and we got the money! it was awesome. larry took some legal fees and we ended up with $2,000.... pretty good!

larry h parker doesnt just fight for you.... he fights for america. last i heard, he was on his way to the gulf to try and stop the oil spill... with his bare hands...

50 comments:

totsmcgee said...

Doing the deed.

Also lol comment moderation

Chris Bashaw said...

Following you, please follow me.

SolitaryGamer said...

Added. Return the favor bud.

Also interesting story haha

Clifford said...

CAN I GET A TABLEDANCE UP IN HERE?

herpderp said...

Cool blog bro. Just followed you back.

Jimmy Volmer said...

stopping by to show daily love ;)

SMITTY said...

tl;dr

nah jk bro that was funny as fuck
keep it up (no homo)

http://smittyrandall.blogspot.com/

josh said...

kmusicforyou.blogspot.com
thanks!

Mike Cripps said...

good read. will follow you to check back later :) hope to see some more quality stuff!

Tri Duong said...

i enjoyed reading this!

Tri Duong said...

i enjoyed reading this !!

David Davidson said...

That must suck.
Following :)

Stan said...

follow back!

http://whateveritsonmymind.blogspot.com/

Harrysoon said...

A good read.

J said...

Nice two thousand dollars

BKRandy said...

lol good read

Mayhem said...

Damn, I'm sure it sucks to nail your hand to a plate :P

Daily lols said...

Glad to see you have new content up!

http://heycheckthisoutguyz.blogspot.com/

justinb7714 said...

Cool story bro.

Unknown said...

Fellow /b/rother, I have done as you requested. Now, I ask you do the same for me.

http://portal2news.com/0b848

http://gmhaha.blogspot.com/ said...

thats pretty cool.

http://gmhaha.blogspot.com/

help me help you

Winchi said...

im witcha bro

jerbearxi said...

I laughed so hard. I hope you update daily. Check me out.

CrapfileYP said...

at least you got 2000 dollars. :P

BOOK OR CONSEQUENCE said...

Dig the blog, nice comment organization page too!

Followed :] Check mine!

The Alaskan Reviewer said...

cool story bro!

The Alaskan Reviewer said...

nailing your hand, genius!

WakeOfBuzzards said...

Dayum, congratz bro!

GRAYZR said...

shit is hilarious man

Jordan22 said...

LOL haven't seen a commerical for this guy in a while!

razortek said...

cool story bro now following 'n' supportin' ;)

http://wtfiniggagun.blogspot.com

Biff Tanner said...

LOL F-ing sweet
Support your local blogs

Mutfux

highlyDangerous said...

awesome. follow me

Max said...

Great stuff. Following and supporting.

http://reviewsbymax.blogspot.com/

HomicidalToaster said...

HA! Swell stuff.

Brian said...

Larry H. Parker the new Chuck Norris?! you tell me haha

Squall said...

2000 bucks? wow :>

Alex DeLarge said...

yes, I do hate that

Light Weight Baby! said...

nice information

Discerning Gentleman said...

that sounds very interesting!

Jimmy Volmer said...

that's an interesting way of looking at it...

hunter time said...

lol he sounds boss

razortek said...

daily fun in here :)
supp mine too

wtfiniggagun.blogspot.com

razortek said...

love to my bro ;)

wtfiniggagun.blogspot.com

Hitman said...

supportin!

x said...

mmmm, ouch.

razortek said...

love to mah bro

wtfiniggagun.blogspot.com

check this too to find new interesting blogs to luv daily

thefuckinlist.blogspot.com

Bub said...

nice mate,i'l do daily round on your blog,please do aswell

UnseenSniper said...

Nice, that's awesome!

Venefican said...

larry is a cool dude