Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Sonic Burger

Sonic Burger is lame!

i live in southern california. we got a few of these shitty burger joints called sonic burger out here. they claim to be americas drive in. screw that! i hate sonic. the bitches have got to be the slowest people on the planet. the whole system they use is jacked up. so you get to sonic burger and you have a couple of choices. you can either pull your car into a special stall where you can sit and rot... or you can get your fat lazy ass out of your car and sit at a table and rot. in either case, if you do ever actually get your food, congratulations! you place your order through this magical talking board. you press the button and wait for some asshat to say, "welcome to sonic, can i make your life miserable?".

the sonic i went to took roughly 15 minutes just to answer the god damned board call. i could have died in that time! do you have any idea what can take place in 15 minutes? i do, and let me tell you something, it is a lot of crap. so the dumb bitch finally comes on and asks me for my order. i look at the 5 foot neon sign that says ONION RINGS. i lean in for the kill... i would like some small onion rings. "we are out of onion rings". are you serious? you have a sign that had to cost about $500 and you took the time to light it up and you dont even carry the product it advertises.

i finally place my order and i wait. i have seen turkish prisons that operate more smoothly than this place. like a conveyerbelt of stupidity, the waitresses come out 1 by 1 shouting, "who go the tots?" you simply raise your hand and BAM! you get your order. but in my situation, my order never came. i asked 3 times for it. people that got there 15 minutes after were getting their food, why couldnt i get mine? i will tell you why! they just give orders at random to people. they dont give a shit who takes it, they just want the food out of the kitchen. i finally had to talk to the pink midget that was the manager and explain to her that i am not some piece of meat that can be left to die.

this got me thinking, how can a place called sonic be so shitty and slow? the real sonic is fast and furious and has a "life partner" named tails. and you can ask tails... he is really fast. and the real sonic knows how you really want it. you think it is really kinky when he has all those rings dont you? so anyway, after i finally get my order, it is wrong. i said screw it and ate it all. after about 1 1/2 hours, i had my meal and about a good portion of anger. i hate sonic burger, the food tastes like shit.

as if my whole experience couldnt get any worse.... i got spammed. some dumbass came up to me and asked for money for children in some country i couldnt pronounce. i look at this guy, he has a desi-gner shirt on with pretty nice shoes... along with a good pair of shorts. mabye if these kids werent so busy making this guys clothes, they could be out getting some decent money. i say we do the american thing and just let what happens happen, then worry about it after the fact.

THANK YOU sonic for a great experience! i will be sure to rate you guys right up there with ball in a cup.

1 comment:

tanya said...

thanks for making me glad that i've never been there.

i don't even know where there's one located at.