Target

listen... weve all been to target. lol i call it targé.... really? do you? wow... thats a new one to me. you see, i was living under a rock with cork in my ears for the last 50 years. im totally impressed by your wit. 

i go here to buy stuff. i use money. easy... they sell everything from luggage to toys. you can even get food here! the food court is pretty awful. the popcorn tastes like sandpaper and the hot dog may as well be fecal matter in a bun. if youre coming to target to eat, you are fat, ugly, and need help. 

some of the things i like to do at target:

open packages of underwear.... people wont buy open underwear 
touch EVERYTHING.... everything
go to the freezer section and ask for odd food items... gator bits
play games in electronics while a little kid waits... his mom is totally right there and wants to leave... he is all worried he wont get a turn... i just play until the mom is like LETS GO! lol.... then as they are leaving i make sure the kid sees me...